In our last post, we were discussing the facts associated with couples therapy and marriage counseling for those Southlake couples seeking help. We touched upon a few very positive statistics concerning the success rate of counseling. But, not all couples therapy or marriage counseling sessions will end with a reconciliation. But this does not mean that the counseling sessions were a failure, it just means sometimes the best course of action is one in which a couple goes their separate ways. After all, the ultimate goal of therapy is to seek a solution that makes everybody happy in the long term.

When considering whether or not marriage counseling works, the real question is can it save a marriage, and in some cases, the answer is simply no. There are instances when a therapist will encourage a couple to seek an end to the relationship. But that is not to say the therapy did not work. According to research, up to 25 percent of couples who receive therapy report their relationships have become worse two years after ending marriage counseling sessions. This leads to the conclusion that not all couples can make their relationship work, and there is no shame in that. In fact, it is within these failed relationships that couples learn more about themselves and carry that knowledge into their future relationships.

You might be wondering if seeking couples therapy in Southlake is a good idea. There is a whole lot of information concerning the success rate of marriage counseling, but all too often people are inclined to believe the rumors as opposed to relying on the facts. That is, your perception of what couples therapy might be completely opposite the reality of marriage counseling. But one thing for sure, while marriage counseling might bring two sweethearts back together in wedded bliss, it might be the deciding factor that leads to a separation or divorce. After all, not all marriages will stand the test of time, regardless how willing both parties want it to work. So whether you have had a few bumps along the way in your relationship or your marriage is already on the rocks, here are some statistics that will help you determine whether or not you want to seek help.

According to the American Association of Marriage and Family Therapists, couples and families who have completed couples therapy sessions indicate a very high rate of overall satisfaction. In fact, a whopping 98 percent of patients surveyed reported they received good to excellent couples therapy. And over 97 percent of those happy couples reported that they received the help they so desperately needed. After their therapy sessions, 93 percent of patients admitted they have learned to use more effective tools when dealing with conflict within their relationships. A majority of these very same patients also noted they enjoyed improved physical health and the ability to function better at work after attending couples therapy.

Every relationship is bound to experience both the highs and the lows. This is quite normal. But determining whether your marriage is experiencing a small bump or if it is something more serious is no small task. If you are asking yourself these tough questions, it might be time to seek marriage counseling from a Southlake therapist.

Marriages tend to change over the course of time especially if there are other circumstances present or a major transition is happening. For example, you might be feeling the stresses of having another child or perhaps your spouse is back in college pursuing a graduate degree. A good marriage counselor can help you get through these difficult periods so you and your partner can regain your focus on each other.

If you are sailing through life happy and satisfied when suddenly your spouse suggests therapy, you should take that as a good sign. In the beginning, you might wonder what you have been doing wrong and that you have failed in marriage and will get divorced. But this is certainly not always the case. Your spouse may just be being proactive and wants the marriage to work out and is willing to put forth the effort.

Like we mentioned earlier, all relationships experience ups and downs and most couples dig out from the downs and move forward. But if you feel like you are merely treading water or you’re the only one working at the relationship, a marriage counselor can help turn this around.

As a kid, you probably kicked and screamed all the way to your dentist appointment. This resistance was understandable, as it was based on all the horrible things you heard from friends and classmates. That is, dentist visits meant pain, tears, uncontrollable drooling and a cheap toothbrush as a reward. But you soon realized the minor discomfort suffered at the hand of your dentist greatly outweighed the pain you would likely suffer having to deal with a cavity or worse.

For many, seeking family counseling in Southlake is much like going to the dentist. We resist seeking help simply based on misunderstandings. If these were cleared up, you wouldn’t be so hesitant about seeking a therapist.

One of the most common barriers that prevent people from seeking the help they need is the existence of a problem. There is something resilient about the human race, we want to prove ourselves and overcome adversity without the help of others. But refusing to come to terms with an obvious problem is not brave, just foolhardy. Ignore that knocking noise in your engine long enough and you will soon find yourself stranded on the side of the road.

There still exists a social stigma attached to seeking a counselor. There is this impression among those who have never tried counseling that it is only for those who are really sick or mentally ill. But counseling covers so many facets, from the college student who needs help dealing with stress to the family on the verge of a total meltdown.

Addictions affect the family and loved ones as well as the community in general and often leads to dysfunction, strained relationships, unemployment and even worse. According to numerous studies, well over 20 million people right here in the United States are addicted to or dependent on alcohol or a wide range of drugs. However, there are also millions of more Americans who are addicted to things and activities that are outside the scope of drugs and alcohol. It is technically true that you can be addicted to just about anything and you can engage in these things in an addictive manner.

When the general population thinks about an addict, they will often associate them with a derelict existing on the margins of society. The reality is that addictions can happen to anybody at any given time, regardless of age, socioeconomic status or background. An addictive behavior can develop in anybody who uses it to distract from feelings of deep discomfort, trauma or pain. These addictive actions, whether it is positive or negative, release endorphins that allow the feeling of pleasure. The release of this chemical reinforces the behaviors that help them feel good. So a person might exercise constantly because it makes them feel good, but the underlining problems are left unresolved. These people will engage in whatever activity they find pleasing and it will continue to grow and get worse over time. As a result, damage will begin to occur.

When people get married, all too many assume it will be a fairytale. You meet “the one,” have a wonderful and fulfilling courtship, get married on the perfect day of your life and simply live happily ever after. But not all marriages wind up as fairytales. Many couples go into a relationship without the tools to manage the challenges that come with every marriage. If you have been experiencing difficulties in your relationship, Southlake couples therapy can help. But just when should you consider therapy? Here are a few trigger points and behaviors that are signs you need help.

Many relationship issues begin and end with communication. Once communication between a couple has deteriorated, it is all too difficult to get it back on track without the help of a therapist. There are couples who continue to talk, but their communication is always negative. Negative communication can include any words that leave the partner feeling rejected, shamed, insecure or judged. Negative communication also includes not just the words one says, but the manner in which they are said.

Each party in a relationship has every right to privacy, but when secrets are kept from each other then it’s a sign something might not be right.

Contrary to the popular and outdated belief that only crazy people seek the services of a therapist, many families and individuals discover that working with a mental health professional is of great value. That is, seeking family counseling or individual counseling from a Southlake therapist is a sound decision. The stigma of seeking the help of a qualified therapist is quickly dissipating as the merits of a skilled professional have shown through time after time. Here are a few common reasons individuals seek the help of a therapist.

Major life events such as deaths, divorces, health issues and financial crisis are all reasons to have us concerned. We deal with stress on a daily basis, but when it seems the world is closing in around you, it is time to seek help. It is important to keep our focus in life and understand that these types of things happen. Often, getting through these types of circumstance is easier when a professional is there for guidance.

If you find yourself struggling to get out of bed each morning, you could be suffering depression. Everybody has days when they would rather stay curled up under the covers, but if this is a daily occurrence, you might want to consider seeking the help of a professional. Depression is a serious condition and difficult to pull yourself out of on your own. Speak with a qualified therapist about the things that bring you down.

People who suffer from addiction have no control over what they are doing, taking or using. Their addiction, whatever it may be, may reach a point at which there are harmful effects. Additions are not limited to the things we consume, like alcohol and drugs, but may include virtually anything, even abstract actions like gambling and harmless products like chocolate. Counseling is recommended for Southlake residents who suffer an addiction. But some people still wonder what constitutes an addiction.

An addiction must meet at least three of the following criteria:

Tolerance– Do you use more drugs or alcohol over the course of time. That is, do you need more drugs or alcohol now than you did several months or years ago.

Withdrawal– When you stop using, do you experience emotional or physical symptoms. For example, have you suffered vomiting, shakes, sweats, nausea or anxiety. Keep in mind that emotional withdrawal is just as critical as the physical symptoms.

Limited Control– You may experience a time when you drink more or take more drugs than you desire. You find it difficult to stop after two or three drinks as you need more to feel the effects. You do this even though you are quite aware of the regret you will have the next day.

You may be an otherwise happily married couple who happens to find yourselves in the middle of some difficult communication problems. She feels that he simply gets over issues more quickly so talking about them doesn’t do any good anyway and he feels she never listens to what he has to say. Classic communication impasse. This is no way to continue a relationship. But just what is expected when you seek couples therapy with your Southlake therapist?

The challenge most couples face are often just a result of a few patterns between them. Your therapist will help you both recognize the negative patterns that you have fallen into and how they manifest in a relationship. These negative cycles can be resolved through marriage counseling. In identifying the patterns, you will feel empowered and able to step back from conflicts as they occur. You both will also learn how to emphasize the strengths in your relationship and how to better nourish them.

Once the negative pattern has been identified and shown how it affects your relationship, your therapist will assist you in changing it. Understanding the context of you and your partner’s reactions can help deepen your feelings of empathy towards each other. Communicating then becomes a little easier.

We all know just how difficult romantic relationships are to maintain. In some sense, relationships are like cars, they require regular maintenance to keep them properly running. And we all know it is best to have your car fixed as soon as you notice there is a problem with it. Sometimes, we do these repairs ourselves and everything turns out just fine. But other times, despite our best efforts, we need to turn to marriage counseling in Southlake.

Realizing you need counseling is a big step and means you are taking your responsibilities seriously. Fish don’t realize they are wet. They live in that little fishbowl and never get an outside perspective. If you are in a relationship, it is difficult to get a perspective of your relationship from the outside. You need a different perspective to help see things more clearly.

Need other reasons to seek marriage counseling?

Has something major occurred in your lives recently? Maybe you are planning a major relocation, just had a baby or are starting a new job, changes that can cause a rift in the relationship. Often, relationships are rather smooth sailing until an outside force throws a wrench in the proverbial gears.

The chances are pretty good that you know a family, friend or family member who is in therapy, which is really of little surprise. While therapy has traditionally been associated with individuals or couples, more and more we are seeing entire families enter counseling sessions. There are plenty of reasons Southlake residents seek family counseling, here are just a few.

Black Sheep– Many families seek therapy because a member becomes such a bother they feel they need a therapist to resolve the issues. The family member in question could be a rebellious teenager or alcoholic father.

Abuse– If a family is experiencing any form of abuse, it needs to be dealt with as soon as possible. What people often overlook is the fact the verbal abuse is extremely detrimental. There is also such a thing as financial abuse and emotional abuse.

Crisis– A family that is in crisis will benefit from therapy. If a family member is struggling with an addiction to alcohol, drugs ar even gambling, it affects all family members. A family who has been through a natural disaster such as a hurricane, flood or tornado may also be struggling to cope. The goal of a therapist is to assist the family in verbalizing their story and share their emotions.

If you know a lot of Southlake people who are in couples therapy, it is because the stigma of marriage counseling, or therapy in general, has greatly diminished over the years. Seeking therapy for anything from an alcohol addiction to family counseling is not a trend, it is a way to better your life as well as the lives of those close to you. And while many of the reasons couples seek therapy are quite obvious, people also seek the services of a therapist for under publicized reasons.

Loss of Attraction to Your Spouse– Over the years, you seemed to have lost any physical excitement or pleasure when your spouse is around. You have lost the desire to touch them and wonder if it is due to hormones, age or something else.

You Don’t Respect Your Partner’s Opinion– When your partner talks about something, you do your best not to roll your eyes, but it still happens. You may even think you are genuinely better than your partner.

There is Love, But Something is Missing– You think about your partner when they are away at work or what not, yet you don’t feel connected or even close for that matter. You know your spouse is a good person, but you’re just not feeling it.